/b/ - Random

Anything Goes

Posting Mode: Reply Return

Max message length: 5000


(used to delete files and postings)


  • Supported file types: GIF, JPG, PNG, WebM, OGG, and more
  • Max files: 5
  • Max file size: 50.00 MB
  • Read the global rules before you post, as well as the board rules found in the sticky.

02/27/20 IRC/Matrix/and Discord servers are now available, join here.
02/09/20 /ausneets/ has been added!
11/23/19 Donations can now be made via PayPal, thank you for all of your support!
11/21/19 We have successfully migrated to LynxChan 2.3.0, to see all of the changes to 16chan, click here.

[Index] [Catalog] [Archive] [Bottom] [Refresh]

(44.90 KB 551x517 nlp3.jpg)
story time Anonymous 01/22/2020 (Wed) 09:48:59 No. 4569
TLDR: Fatties and Neuro-linguistic programming >be me >20% of my family (including extended family) are fat >they're too pathetic to stop being fat, so instead they try to make everyone else fat too. >the fatties start bringing bread-y and sugar-y snacks to the weekly family meetings >if anyone doesn't eat the carbs then the fatties subtly attack that person >if anyone brings healthy snacks, then the fatties subtly attack the decision >the other 80% are strongwilled enough to not eat carbs outside of family meetings, but not strong enough to abstain while they happen. >fatties succeed at making carbohydrate snacks the standard at family meetings, but they fail at actually making everyone else fat >I decide to stop eating carbs and sugar >I lead the anti-carb rebellion >a few other people join me in my quest >fatties continue to bring carb-y meals, each time they bring a different kind of junk food >one by one, my comrades fall, the temptation is simply too much >I'm alone, my rebellion failed >fall back into degeneracy once a week >actually this happened with both sides of my family, but at different ocasions "anon, you're such a coward, why do you care what your family does?" you're right, I was a coward. then... >be me >be with the only fattie that I know that is actively trying to improve >we're discussing what the final solution could be >fattie tells me a story about how he used neuro-linguistic programming to make himself immune to all carb urges. In summary his technique worked for a few years but his asshole mage friend convinced him to undo it. >he decides to do some NLP on me, and on himself. >him: "why do you still eat white flour and refined sugar?" >me: "because I get the oportunity to, and then I make stupid excuses to comply" >him: "why do you make the excuses?" >me: "i dont know why I make those excuses" >him: "those excuses aren't a conscious choice, they are made by a subconscious program that has good intentions for you and is implementing them in a way that conflicts with your desire to be healthy, lets fix that." >he contacts the program that creates those excuses >program says that the carbs must be eaten, because my other antisocial habits already created much social friction >I, he, the program, and other subconscious programs negotiate a truce for like 15 minutes >end result is that we decide to become immune to the social order by self-improving so much that everyone admires me >this just happened, i dont know if it will work, I've set a new list of eating rules and punishments for myself. FUCK FATTIES. FATTIES ARE TRAITORS. IF YOU HAVE ONE BULLET AND THERE'S A TRAITOR AND AN ENEMY BEFORE YOU THEN YOU SHOOT THE TRAITOR. FATTIES WILL HANG BEFORE THE JEWS DO, ATLEAST THE JEWS HAVE SELF-RESPECT.
>>4569 You sound retarded... which is even worse than being fat. Look, retard, stop with all the tin foil hat CIA psycho-babble for a minute and just level with this shit I'm layin on out for ya... FOOD IS ADDICTIVE! ...it's not complicated. Sugar tastes GOOD. Carbs taste GOOD. And when you eat shit that tastes GOOD it makes your brain FEEL GOOD! If you want to stop being fat you need to comprehend it as an ADDICTION and start looking at WHY you became dependent upon that addiction. More than likely you hate yourself, you got stress, you got problems, you got all sorts of PERSONAL SHIT that you need to get squared away BEFORE you try and lose any weight. Otherwise you're not removing the INCENTIVE to keep stuffing your face. You are caught in a vicious cycle, plain and simple. And the reason your whole family is fat is because they all enable each other's addictions. You need to get the fuck out of that environment. Changing your environment (like who you hang out with) is usually the quickest way towards self-improvement. PS - This is now the FAT PEOPLE thread.
(101.62 KB 600x450 100 Pounds Of Fat.jpg)
(88.48 KB 400x630 Miscellaneous - Fat Fury.jpg)
(16.68 KB 300x357 Fat Ass Inflate.jpg)
(49.36 KB 600x449 Fatty Rockout.jpg)
Belly bump!
>>4572 this person speaks the truth
(73.24 KB 750x600 Fat People.jpg)
(48.28 KB 600x750 You're Fat.jpg)
(50.22 KB 640x480 Shay - Ur Sofa.jpg)
(93.44 KB 480x640 Oh Noes.jpg)
(93.39 KB 500x400 Moose Knuckle.jpg)
(50.45 KB 604x483 Gothopotamus.jpg)
(67.93 KB 562x434 Go Be Fat Somewhere Else.jpg)
(108.09 KB 550x425 Fiona.jpg)
(79.97 KB 750x600 Blending In.jpg)
(231.11 KB 852x1288 20200321_233647.jpg)
(1.60 MB 1600x900 holocaust.png)
I guess I'll tell my own tale from a good number of years back. It's pretty unrelated, but it involves a retard so it's funny shut up >be me, 3rd grade >have friend who has 3DS >bus is redneck incarnate, his device is a safe haven from the endless niggering and hickering >friend has severely autistic brother >open up videos >look at funny ass stop motions and plush videos friend made because they're funny for 2 sperg ass 9 year olds >see video in his bathroom >wut >autistic brother made this one >camera pans around >QUICKLY PANS DOWN TO RETARD PENIS >quickly exit and delete video before we find out if he tries making cream gravy with that fucking vegetable penis I've seen that fucker do more stupid shit, but they're really not too memorable.
(14.29 KB 300x150 1573388436292.jfif)
subtley attack? i would tell this cancerous fucking cow to go eat their own cake on the toilet instead of eating the fruit i brought.
and how fucking dare you. the jews IS THE REASON why your family is fuckibg fat


no cookies?